While celebrating a new life and transitioning into a new role, a mother found herself struggling to get a moment alone after she welcomed her daughter. A time that was meant to be exciting for her and her husband led to them having a big fight over their parenting roles.
In the whirlwind of joy and exhaustion in the early days of parenthood, a mother found herself longing for a mere moment of quietness and alone time. She took to Reddit to share her frustrations. She started off by explaining that she had only had her child for two weeks. Her daughter was strictly breastfeeding, but in addition to cluster feeding, she realized her daughter found comfort in being close to her.
A mother holding her new born | Source: Shutterstock
This meant that her new role allowed her little to no time alone. “I’ve showered once by myself since having her, and it only lasted long enough for me to soap up before she was crying and my husband was bringing her into the bathroom with me. I think I literally had all of 2-3 minutes,” she wrote.
On the contrary, she noticed her husband’s life had not changed. He still got to have long and uninterrupted showers every day but never understood why his showers frustrated his wife.
Each time she was in the shower, and the baby would cry, her husband would bring their newborn to her to calm her down. It made her angry that he did not even try to calm the baby down on his own, but his excuse was that the child loved showers, and seeing her cry hurt him deeply.
A mother with her baby | Source: Shutterstock
As sweet as his fears sounded, the Redditor still needed to find a way to get a full self-care routine without a baby being handed over to her. So, she decided to call in help. She asked her mother to watch her daughter as she showered. Her husband was not there when she reached out to her child’s grandmother, but when he arrived, he asked what his mother-in-law was doing at their house.
Surprisingly, he was angry at his wife’s decision to call her mother just to take a shower. “I could have watched her. Why would you do that?” he asked, to which the Redditor responded, “Every time you watch her while I shower, she ends up in here with me within 2 minutes of me being in here because you don’t even try to calm her down.”
A mother with her baby | Source: Shutterstock
Therefore, after five days of trying to shave her legs, she could not wait to enjoy the warm water hitting her body and relaxing her muscles. “I need to self-care,” the Redditor emphasized.
The original poster’s honest account of her experience as a new mother erupted in a chorus of voices from commenters sharing their own experiences and offering support. One commenter challenged the husband’s logic and suggested, “If, according to hubby, showers calm her down, why isn’t he taking her on his 30-60 minute showers?”
A mother looking stressed with her child | Source: Shutterstock
Another suggestion was for the OP to lock the door as a temporary solution and to teach her husband a lesson on respecting someone’s privacy. Another Reddit user said the husband made himself look bad in front of his mother-in-law, but it was time he realized that he could also parent his daughter without always running to his wife.
The discussion took a deeper dive into the dynamics of communication and support within the relationship. Commenters pointed out the absurdity that the husband had been more concerned about his wife calling her mother rather than making sure that his wife’s well-being was attended to. “You found a way around it. And now, even knowing how hard it’s been for you, he’s still not actually concerned about you; he’s just worried about how it looks to your mum,” remarked a commenter.
A man sitting next to a crib looking stressed | Source: Shutterstock
One mother said her husband once interrupted her hair appointment but she had a serious conversation with him and made him look back at the number of haircuts he had had since their baby arrived. She told him never to interrupt her alone time unless it was an emergency, so the commenter advised the OP to have the same stern conversation with her husband.
A couple fighting | Source: Shutterstock
Another commenter shared a personal story of how her husband had slacked at the beginning of their parenting journey and how she eventually found a way to work as a team. The mother said her baby was a bit fussy on the first night home and she would always take the lead and calm her down.
But after three days, she put on earplugs and requested her husband only wake her up when the baby needed a feed and let her partner take care of the baby during the night, which led to a more equitable parenting dynamic.
The commenter added that allocating responsibilities helped them both understand the difficulty and joy of caring for a newborn, but it also allowed them to foster empathy and understanding. “That night, my partner became an equal parent,” the commenter added.
Here is a story about a newborn who cried nonstop no matter what the parents did. But they eventually realized the answer to their child’s misery was in the crib.
Rich Landlord Evicts Poor Elderly Tenant, Then Walks Into a Shocking Surprise at Family Dinner!
A cold-hearted landlord gave a woman an eviction notice because she couldn’t pay her rent. But when he went to his sister’s house for dinner, he was shocked to see her there.
Life is tough, and it’s even worse when the people around us have no compassion. Diane Salinger knew what tough times were like. At sixty-two, she had faced more bad days than good and shed many tears.
But Diane wasn’t someone who gave up easily. Whenever life knocked her down, she got back up, ready to fight again. She lost her husband three years ago, and then a tornado destroyed her home. Still, she started over once more.
Source: Unsplash
She used her savings to buy a small grocery store in a nice town in Michigan. It was perfect for her—big enough to enjoy exotic items she wanted to sell, but small enough to feel cozy.
The town may have been cozy, but Diane’s landlord, Chris Turkle, wasn’t. Diane rented a small apartment from Chris that was close to her store.
When times are tough, people should help each other. Diane was the perfect tenant. She was quiet, respectful, and always paid her rent on time. Then one month, she came up short.
Chris counted the money from her envelope and waved it in her face. “You’re $120 short, Mrs. Salinger.”
Diane blushed. “As I explained, Mr. Turkle, with so many businesses struggling during Covid, I extended credit to some families in need. This month I’m a bit short. I’ll pay the $120 in two weeks.”
“If you want to play Mother Teresa, that’s your problem,” Chris snapped. “I’m a businessman, not a charity! I want you out by the end of the week!”
“But Mr. Turkle,” Diane pleaded. “It’s just one week, and I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again.”
“It happened once, and that’s enough. You’re out,” Chris said coldly as he walked away. He felt justified. Diane’s grocery store seemed busy, with people constantly coming in and out with full shopping bags. “Short on cash? Yeah, right,” Chris thought. “She’s just taking advantage.”
Chris went home to get ready for dinner at his sister Vanessa’s house. He often worried about her. She was a single mom, working two jobs to support herself and her 16-year-old son. Chris had offered her son a weekend job, but Vanessa always refused, saying, “It’s okay, Chris. I’ll manage.” But Chris had noticed she looked tired and worn out.
Since it was his nephew’s birthday, Chris tucked $20 in an envelope, put it in his jacket, and walked to Vanessa’s house.
Vanessa greeted him with a smile. She seemed more relaxed than usual, and the house smelled delicious. “Hey!” he said, giving her a kiss on the cheek. “Where’s the birthday boy?”
“Playing video games with Diane,” Vanessa smiled. “Come on in!” She called up the stairs, “Joss, Diane, time for dinner!”
To Chris’ shock, in walked Mrs. Salinger—the tenant he had just evicted! She seemed to get along well with his sister and nephew. Diane looked surprised but stayed calm.
“Hello,” she said with a smile. “I didn’t know you were Vanessa’s brother.”
Chris blushed. “Yes, she’s my younger sister.”
“Everyone, come on! The roast is ready,” Vanessa called.
“Roast!” Joss exclaimed. “That’s my favorite! But mom, I thought you didn’t get paid until next week. How did you afford this?”
Diane smiled at Joss and patted his hand. “Don’t worry about that,” she said. “Your mom’s credit is good with me. Now, let’s eat!”
Chris leaned in and asked quietly, “Is Vanessa the person you’re helping?”
Diane nodded. “She’s one of them. One of her jobs didn’t work out, so I’m just helping until she’s back on her feet.”
Chris felt ashamed. “I’m so sorry… about everything. Why didn’t Vanessa ask me for help?”
Diane replied gently, “She has her pride. She wants to stand on her own. It’s easier to accept help from a friend than to feel like a burden on family.”
Chris whispered, “From now on, you can have the apartment at half-price. Consider it an investment in our town—and in my sister.”
By the end of the evening, Chris realized Diane was a kind and funny woman. He enjoyed her company, and his view of the community changed. He decided to follow Diane’s example and start offering a helping hand.
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