For different people, tattoos and other body markings can represent a wide range of meanings. Something that is revered in one part of the world could be viewed as inappropriate in another; a symbol or piece of art that has significant value in one place might seem like random squiggles in another. It’s safe to say, in my opinion, that for as long as we have been as a species, people have used their appearances to communicate ideas and express themselves.
Unless you’re a resident of a remote island, you’re probably accustomed to seeing tattooed individuals. Certain designs can be little regrets from childhood, but others might have deeper significance—telling tales or following customs or traditions, for example.I don’t know about you, but I always find it fascinating when I see the same tattoo on multiple people.
That is to say, I’m instantly captivated by the meaning of the tattoo and the reasons the owner felt it was so important to have it on display for the rest of their lives. One that I have witnessed many times over the years but have never taken the time to look into is the so-called “red string of fate.”
The small red tattoo will certainly be recognizable to some of our readers, but it is unlikely that many of those who have seen it before will get its symbolic meaning. I did say that I had seen a couple folks with the tattoo. Certainly enough to identify a trend. I had no idea what this mark meant, but it had to imply something.
I used the internet to conduct some research and found that the red thread tattoo in issue is known as the “red string of fate” in Asian traditions. Usually seen on men’s thumbs and women’s pinky fingers, the tattoo has a basic bow-like design with tails that mimics a tied shoelace.This small tattoo has a meaning that is centered on optimism and desire.
The tale is purportedly based on a folktale from China about a matchmaker who foretells the partners that each of us is destined to meet.Naturally, the notion that one is fated to meet someone else is not exclusive to romantic endeavors, nor is the idea of sharing an invisible relationship with another person confined to any one culture; rather, it is present in practically all of them.
No matter where they are, when they are, or what happens, two people are meant to be lovers, according to the red string of fate. That is a comforting and pleasurable concept for some people. Still others, meanwhile, surely would prefer to be masters of their own fate.
My MIL Called Me Ungrateful for Not Eating Food She Cooked While I Was on a Pre-Surgery Diet, and My Husband Backed Her Up
When Mel has surgery scheduled, she has no choice but to follow a strict diet in preparation. But one day, her mother-in-law shows up, ready to cook up a storm and disrespect Mel’s new regime. Soon, tempers flare…
My husband, Dave, and I have always had a solid relationship. Sure, like most couples, there are ups and downs, but we handle them pretty well in general.
A smiling couple | Source: Midjourney
Except when it comes to his mom, Margaret.
Margaret has a knack for inserting herself into our lives, often under the pretense of being helpful. She’ll just drop by unannounced, often claiming to be worried about how I’m taking care of her son.
“Mel, it’s just my mom’s way of showing her love,” Dave would say, dismissing it all. “She’s always been so dramatic, and that’s just one of those things.”
A smiling older woman | Source: Midjourney
But to me, it just felt invasive.
Recently, things took quite a turn for the worse. I have a chronic condition that requires surgery on my spine. As a result, my doctor has put me on a strict pre-surgery diet.
“It’s not going to be great, Mel,” he told me when I went for my last check-up. “But it’s necessary, I promise you. We need you to cut down on your body weight so that after the surgery, the stress on your spine will be less.”
A woman sitting at a doctor’s office | Source: Midjourney
I understood the assignment, and I was committed to my health.
“Look, honey,” I told Dave when I went home after my appointment. “You don’t have to change your diet at all. I’ll still get you everything you want to eat, and cook what you want, too. But there’s a bunch of food that I have to avoid.”
A couple standing in a kitchen | Source: Midjourney
“No,” my husband reassured me. “I’ll do it with you. Just put the list of forbidden items on the fridge, and I’ll know what to avoid.”
I had to admit, I was surprised by Dave. This man loved his fried food. The greasier the better when it came to my husband’s diet. But this change was good for both of us, and I loved that he was being supportive.
Notes on a fridge | Source: Midjourney
So, we began diligently avoiding sugar, limiting carbs, and eating lots of greens and lean proteins. It was quite a lifestyle change, because now I had to be strict about everything I put into my mouth. But I knew that it was going to be worth it in the end.
But then, Margaret turned up like a storm about the disrupt our peace.
Last weekend, as I was reading in our home office, Margaret showed up with bags full of groceries.
A person holding a grocery bag | Source: Midjourney
Without even asking, she started preparing Dave’s favorite meal: fried chicken, mashed potatoes drenched in butter, and a decadent chocolate cake.
“Do you need any help?” I asked her when I realized that she was about to cook up a storm.
“No, darling,” she said. “You go and relax; I’m fine here.”
An older woman cooking | Source: Midjourney
So, I let her take over the kitchen. The aroma filled the house, and I felt my stomach rumble. But I knew that I couldn’t eat any of it. On one hand, I felt that Margaret was being inappropriate, but on the other hand, I was glad that Dave was getting some good food that he enjoyed.
When dinner was ready, I politely declined.
A plate of fried chicken | Source: Midjourney
“I’m really sorry, Margaret,” I began while taking out my salad greens and leftover grilled chicken from the fridge.
“What are you doing?” she asked, looking at the food that I laid out on the counter, ready to make myself dinner.
“There’s more than enough food, Mel. You don’t need to make more,” she huffed.
A woman looking into a fridge | Source: Midjourney
“I’m just making my dinner,” I said slowly. “As incredible as your meal smells and looks, I can’t eat any of it. I’m on a strict diet for my surgery. I cannot afford to have any slip-ups.”
Instead of understanding the situation like any rational person, my mother-in-law’s face twisted in displeasure.
An angry older woman | Source: Midjourney
“Oh, come on, Mel,” she said. “I worked really hard on this meal. Just a little won’t hurt.”
“I appreciate it, and I’m so grateful that you’re here and that you cooked this meal for Dave, but I just cannot risk it. This surgery is too important,” I insisted.
Cue the meltdown.
A close-up of an expressionless woman | Source: Midjourney
She started muttering under her breath about how ungrateful I was, making a big show of serving Dave a heaping plate of food. I felt a knot form in my stomach, not from hunger, but from the tension.
Then, she turned to Dave.
“Isn’t it a shame? I go through all this trouble, and she can’t even try a bite of it.”
A plate of food | Source: Midjourney
I looked at my husband, expecting him to defend me. Instead, he shrugged and put a forkful of mashed potato into his mouth.
“Maybe just have a small bite, honey,” he said with his mouth full. “Just be polite. Have a piece of chicken and some mash.”
I couldn’t believe it. He was the person who didn’t mind changing up his diet and his routine because he wanted to support me. What was this? What was this change of behavior?
A man eating at the table | Source: Midjourney
“Dave, you know I can’t. It’s not just about being polite. It’s about my health. You know I only have a few weeks to get ready.”
Margaret’s eyes narrowed as she picked up a plate for herself.
“It’s just one meal, Melissa. I don’t see what the big deal is. Is that really how you speak to my son? And you’re making me feel like my food isn’t good enough for you.”
A close-up of an older woman | Source: Midjourney
“That’s not it at all, Margaret,” I said, trying to keep my voice calm. “I’m sure the food is delicious as always, but I need to be strict here. I cannot afford any setbacks. This is my spine we’re talking about!”
“Oh, please,” she scoffed. “You’re just being overly dramatic. People have been eating real food like this for centuries without all these modern health scares.”
I could feel the heat rise in my blood. My anger was building, and so was my disappointment.
A close-up of an angry woman | Source: Midjourney
But before things could escalate further, the doorbell rang.
It was George, my father-in-law, dropping by to pick up some tools. He walked into the kitchen just as Margaret was going on about how I was “too good” for her cooking.
George surveyed the scene quickly and then looked directly at Margaret.
A smiling older man | Source: Midjourney
“Margaret, you know she’s on a diet for her surgery. This isn’t about politeness or niceties. It’s about Mel’s health. She has been trying to sort out her spine issues for years now, Marg, you know this,” he said. “You need to respect that.”
Margaret opened her mouth to argue, but George didn’t give her a chance.
“If you can’t respect their boundaries, maybe you should stop coming over unannounced.”
An older woman holding her head | Source: Midjourney
I was stunned.
George had never intervened in these situations before, and to see him take such a strong stance was both surprising and incredibly comforting.
Margaret stormed out of the dining room, clearly upset, but George stayed behind.
An upset woman storming out | Source: Midjourney
“Oh, gosh,” my husband muttered, putting his piece of chicken down as he pushed his chair back to run after his mother.
George turned to me with a kind smile.
“You did the right thing. Don’t worry about Margaret; she’ll come around,” he said. “Your health is so important.”
A smiling older man | Source: Midjourney
Dave came running back in, looking thoroughly chastened.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I shouldn’t have said anything or tried to force you to eat any of this. I just didn’t want to upset Mom, but I realize now that I should have supported you.”
George nodded approvingly.
A man sitting at a table and holding his head | Source: Midjourney
“You’re right, Dave. This is your family, and you need to prioritize your wife’s well-being.”
“Please, you two carry on eating,” I said, returning to the kitchen. “I’m going to make some salad.”
A salad with grilled chicken on a counter | Source: Midjourney
While I was in the kitchen, I saw Margaret sitting on the bench outside. I could have gone to her, but I hated the way she had spoken to me.
Later, after the three of us had eaten, George took Margaret home.
An older woman outside | Source: Midjourney
As we got into bed, Dave apologized to me again and promised to be more supportive in the future.
It felt good to clear the air, but I couldn’t shake the feeling of unease. Before they left, Margaret had just walked past us, not even saying goodbye.
Anyway, I still had bigger things to worry about. My surgery was more important.
A couple sitting in bed together | Source: Midjourney
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