It’s uplifting to witness women supporting each other, whether it’s friends offering help or strangers extending support to those they’ve never met. In this story, a woman quietly left a letter for her ex-boyfriend’s future girlfriend, offering a heads-up about what to anticipate and sharing lessons from her own experience. The new girlfriend shared this moving act of solidarity on Reddit, where she received an outpouring of encouragement and advice from the online community.
She wrote:
“My boyfriend Steve (30m) and I (28f) have been together for 2 years and have been living together for 8 months. I was cleaning our apartment when I found a note in the back of a cabinet that read:
‘Dear Steve’s Future Girlfriend,
I know it’s you reading this because he’d never clean back here. I’m putting this here because I’m leaving him soon and want to warn you about him:
1-He will not clean;
2-He will not listen;
3-He will make everything feel like it’s your fault;
It’s not your fault, he’s just an incompetent man. I’m leaving him, I suggest you do the same.
Best wishes, Natalia'”
She added:
“I read the note and brought it to show to him and hear his response. He immediately ripped it up and said not to listen to it, that she was crazy and untrustworthy. I told him that the fact that he hasn’t found the note in the 5 years since they broke up is a red flag to me because it does mean he’s never cleaned back there and that he has been cleaning less and less since I moved in.
He told me this is just his ex continuing to manipulate and ruin his life, and I was letting it work. We continued to argue along the same lines, and I eventually left to spend the night at a friend’s place.
Steve has been a great boyfriend so far. He gets along with my family. He has given me gifts and flowers and always tells me how much he loves me. He’s not wrong that the cleaning hasn’t really been brought up before, but the note made me realize it had been less and less and that we needed to have a full conversation about this.”
She went on explaining:
“He texted me afterwards saying he’s sorry that I felt like I had to leave, but that it’s a wrong move for me to take a note over our 2-year relationship and to leave him and our pets alone. I don’t know what to do or what to believe right now. I’m contemplating trying to find and reach out to Natalia.
Steve thinks I should come back home and let it go, that his past should not affect our future. He makes it sound like his ex was manipulative and petty throughout their relationship, but I don’t know what to trust.
When we moved in together 8 months ago, the cleaning was 50/50. Since then, he’s been doing things less and less. I have to remind him to do things like to bring his plates to the sink or take out the trash, and I didn’t have to before. The dishes will pile up unless I do them, to the point he’s had leftover food mold on the plates.”
She continued:
“I’m not a confrontational person, so I was just asking him to fix it when it came up. The note made me reflect on it more and try to have an actual full conversation, and I will say I didn’t feel listened to when I talked to him about it.
I tried to use the note to start a conversation about cleaning, and he got so stuck on the fact that I was listening to his ex instead of him, that he wouldn’t listen to what I think are valid concerns. He thinks I’m letting the note have “confirmation bias” so no matter what he says I’ll think he’s in the wrong.
Also, I didn’t leave him permanently, this all happened yesterday and I only spent one night at a friend’s because I didn’t feel like our conversation was going anywhere last night, and he wouldn’t let me sleep until I let it go. I’m going back today and wanted to get advice and feedback before I do.”
Other Redditors chimed in, sharing their own insights and offering advice to her.
- I’m so glad for you. It wasn’t two wasted years since they taught you a valuable lesson. I’m especially grateful for Natalia! Please tell her we love her for her kind solidarity and witty ways. Absolutely, leave a note — but better yet, leave two. One in the same place (he’ll look there; manipulative narcissists aren’t that dumb), and another in an even less likely spot. Sending you my best. You got this, girl! © occasionalpart / Reddit
- Well, he’s not cleaning, he’s not listening to you, and he’s making it out to be your fault “for trusting a note over him.” So, it seems the ex’s assessment might be accurate. It doesn’t look like he’s open to discussing his poor housekeeping, and personally, I don’t think you’ll be able to address it now without the note coming up. Ultimately, it’s up to you to decide whether this is something you can tolerate. It seems he hasn’t learned anything from his last relationship. © VonBoo / Reddit
- You’ve been living together for less than a year, and you’re already having to play mommy, reminding him of basic chores and daily tasks! If Natalia were truly such a manipulative, crazy person, she would have made much harsher and more dramatic accusations than these. © Arya_kidding_me / Reddit
- It’s almost ironic how easy it would have been for him to shut this entire thing down with the simplest of responses: “Hmm, you’re right, I’ll make sure to clean more.” That would have immediately countered points 2 and 3. But he’d rather be right, and he’d rather play the aggrieved party. You didn’t do anything wrong by trying to have a conversation off the back of that note. His reaction should tell you everything. © Mobius_Stripping / Reddit
- I’d be willing to bet money that the note is right. He sounds like the kind of man who will stop doing anything the second he decides a woman is fully trapped. The slow tapering off you’re witnessing is him testing the waters. He needs to figure out whether he just needs to waste enough of your time to get to that stage, or whether you need a ring or a baby to feel trapped. © Extension_Drummer_85 / Reddit
- “Don’t expect to change a man unless he’s in diapers.” This behavior will continue on, he’s gotten away with it before up to a certain point. He wants someone to pick up after him like his mommy.
Any time a guy says, “My ex is/was crazy,” is a MASSIVE red flag right there. It’s something guys have been saying since the dawn of time to belittle their former partners. He’ll say the same thing about you to his next girlfriend. You have to ask yourself, “Was she crazy, or did he drive her crazy with his behavior and laziness?” I’d leave your own note when you do finally dump him. And reach out to his ex, see what she has to say. © Equal-Brilliant2640 / Reddit
When trust is broken between couples, it often leads to a surge of emotional and psychological turmoil, including feelings of uncertainty and profound confusion. In a different scenario, a woman shared a fascinating story of her own sleuthing skills. She discovered her husband was cheating simply by paying close attention to his breakfast order.
Paul McCartney’s only son James makes rare appearance with father – his looks are highly criticized by fans
In the 2000s, James played backup percussion and guitar for some of his dad’s solo releases, like “Flaming Pie” and “Driving Rain.” He also played lead guitar for his mom on the track “The Light Comes from Within,” on the posthumously released album “Wide Prairie.”
When his mom died in 1998, James admits that his ‘perfect world’ was destroyed.
“When I was 17 I wrote my first song and then Mum was diagnosed with cancer. She died when I was 20 and that’s when I went into a very dark period,” he said. He continued, “I was studying art, photography and English at college. I had spent a lot of time at home with Mum and Dad. I got a bit of flak from the college because I wasn’t really present, but I never regretted spending that time with her.”
James found solace in drugs and alcohol, and distanced himself from the family. Adding to his struggles was his relationship his dad’s new wife, Heather Mills, whom Paul was married to from 2002 to 2008.
“My relationship with Heather was not very good. I didn’t like her. But I wouldn’t want to say anything negative about her because she’s a good mother to Beatrice and that’s the most important thing,” James said, speaking of his baby sister that Paul shares with Mills. “Beatrice is adorable. She’s great, a real joy for the whole family.”
In 2007, when his award-winning dad was hospitalized and had angioplasty surgery, James reconnected with his family. “Dad’s great now but that episode made me realize how important he is to me. He was suffering in his own way [because of his high-profile split from Mills]. He was under stress. In hindsight I wish I’d been more supportive,” James said.
In 2011, Paul married Nancy Shevell, to which James says, “Nancy’s my new mother. I feel that. Definitely. She’s very genuine.”
“I removed myself from my family for a while. Now I want to immerse myself in them,” James shared. “I love Dad so much. I’m in a happy place. I’m not high, which is a good thing. I just want to be the best person I can be.”
Slowly gaining traction as a reputable musician, James released his debut single “Available Light” (2010) and then, collaborated with his dad, who worked as co-producer, James delivered his first album, “Me” in 2013, followed by “The Blackberry Train” in 2016.
Though he lived a mostly private life, he told the BBC in 2012 that as a child, he aimed to be “better than the Beatles.”
“When I got to a certain age, I realized that I was somewhat better than other kids at school at guitar and took pride and enjoyment in that,” James said (as per the Daily Mail).
“I then dreamt of being better than The Beatles. I’m not sure if I can do that. If anything, I would love to be equal to The Beatles–but even that’s quite tough.”
He even revealed he was wanting to reanimate the Beatles with the progeny of the Fab Four, including John Lennon’s son, Sean, son of George, Dhani Harrison, and Ringo Starr’s two boys Zach and Jason Starkey.
But quickly shutting down the media explosion over a Beatles incarnation, NBC reports that James clarified that it was just a thought. “Well, looks like quite some attention being given to my BBC interview! Honestly, I was just thinking out loud about playing with Beatles family friends, nothing more. My band’s going to be on tour in the UK and US for most of this year, and the shows are going great! I’m so grateful…. Lots of love to you all…!”
Recently, James appeared with his dad and big sisters at the private viewing of the “Paul McCartney 1963-64: Eyes of the Storm” exhibition at the National Portrait Gallery in London.
The exhibition features extraordinary photographs taken by Sir Paul of The Beatles’ early days.
James, looking similar to his famous dad, was dapper in a black suit paired with a white shirt at the star-studded event.
Tossed into the spotlight where he’s vulnerable to criticism, fans shared their harsh opinions of James, who is a recovering addict.
“They look very much alike! I think this is what Paul would’ve looked like (in his heyday) if he was overweight and didn’t look after himself. His son needs to start looking after himself. It seems as though he over eats, probably an alcoholic. And doesn’t look like his hygiene is up to par.”
Many, reacted to the Daily Mail writing on Facebook that James is Handsome: “They have a different standard of what ‘handsome’ is….Yikes!” writes one user, while another said, “I don’t think I would say he was handsome got his dad’s eyes but that’s all.”
Some suggested that James aged poorly: “Sorry to say this but his son looks like his father and his father looks like his son.”
Falling into the minority of cyber citizens defending James, one follower writes, “Wow look at all the women body shaming the poor guy for his looks, if it was a woman they would be all up in arms if there was any negative comments, leave him alone ffs nothing wrong with him….probably gets more women than most men in here too lol.”
Have you heard any music released by James McCartney? Are you more likely to listen to his recordings because he is the son of a musical legend or are you the type of person who prefers independent artists?
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