Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue actually wrote the marital handbook.
The long-married couple’s book, What Makes a Marriage Last: Insider Stories, contains personal facts about their marriage. Forty Well-Known Couples Share Their Secrets with Us.
The most fascinating revelation made by Marlo is that, even though she and Phil have been married for over 40 years, she never really wanted to get married.
The famous person expressed in the book her previously negative opinion of the institution, saying that marriage is like a vacuum cleaner that sucks away all of your ambition and vitality when you stick it to your ear.
Thomas frequently shares her opinions, likening marriage to having to placate a prisoner. That is, until she met Donahue.
Phil Donahue and Marlo Thomas met following the dissolution of their first marriage, and they have remained lifelong friends ever since.
The Phil Donahue Show, which was eventually renamed as simply “Donahue,” was the vehicle through which Phil Donahue first gained popular recognition. For the first time, audience members participated in the program, which ran for 29 years. One of the visitors on his show who radically changed his life’s trajectory was Marlo Thomas.
The book claims that the two met in 1977 in Chicago, when Phil was bringing four children with him. His fifth child, a daughter, lived somewhere else with her mother and ex-wife.
Marlo and Phil dated for three years before being married in 1980 in front of a small wedding party of thirty-five guests.
Not surprise, Marlo’s friends and family were taken aback by the actress’s sudden change of heart. A hilarious story of Marlo’s bridal shower, where visitors hung notes from the soon-to-be bride that disclosed her past views on marriage, is featured in the couple’s book.
The book claims that Marlo’s mother was the most shocked of all, asking Donahue, “How did you get her to do this?” throughout the nuptials of the pair.
Reportedly, among other emotions, even total strangers voiced shock at the well-known social activist’s decision to get married. While Phil was in the lavatory, a passenger on the airplane the couple took to Greece for their honeymoon expressed displeasure to Marlo, presumably disappointed that she had given up her old independent streak.
In the book, Thomas is honest enough to acknowledge that something was unclear when they spoke. After all her life condemning marriage, was she suddenly a hypocrite for getting married? Had she let those down who held her in high regard as the embodiment of self-reliance?
Even though Donahue and Thomas discuss the usual ups and downs of their long marriage in the book, they manage to make their marriage work to this day. They describe these problems as teaching moments that deepened their relationship.
The couple had been apart from the beginning of their marriage, with Phil traveling to Chicago to tape his show and Marlo traveling to pursue her acting career.
Thomas had a greater understanding of how different individuals define marriage when his aunt said that the couple’s union was void because they weren’t living together exclusively. In spite of their separation, Thomas and Donahue were able to keep their marriage together. Significantly, Marlo’s marriage resulted in her having children.
In a 2012 interview with AARP, Thomas reflected on her experience helping Phil raise his kids, stating she went into it knowing that they already had a traditional mother and that would not be her role.
Rather, Marlo claims that she began to treat Phil’s children more like friends in an effort to mimic the parenting style of her own mother. She continues by saying that she feels more connected to them today than she did at the start of their marriage.
Donahue points out that Thomas really did strive to understand the lads in the book and spent as much time as she could getting to know his sons.
Phil and Marlo believe that their long marriage is a result of her strong bond with his kids and their mutual faith in each other. “You build trust when you realize that this person always has your back,” says Marlo in clarification.
Despite being married for more than 40 years, they still have more memories to make.
Phil goes on to argue that a marriage has to be desired by both parties in order for it to last. Marlo says she would never want to be anything other than married to her lover, echoing his sentiments. She claims that Donahue has assisted her “in every manner possible.”
When two people truly commit to one another, marriage is an incredibly lovely union that is made much more beautiful.
These two have a lot to teach and inspire us all. As satisfying as their relationship is, we should all strive to be in one!
I Suspected My Husband Was Cheating on Me, but I Was Shocked When I Found out Everything at a Family Dinner — Story of the Day
My seemingly perfect marriage took a dark turn when I found a stranger’s earring in our bed. Convinced my husband was cheating, I uncovered secrets far worse than I first imagined, leading to a shocking revelation that turned my world upside down.
Ryan and I had enjoyed four happy years of marriage. He always supported me and cared for me. We resolved everything together, never leaving anyone feeling abandoned.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
That is, until one day when everything changed. While cleaning our bedroom, I found something that definitely wasn’t mine — a single earring under the pillow. My ears aren’t pierced, so the only explanation was that my husband was cheating on me.
My heart raced as I stared at the tiny piece of jewelry in my hand. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. I felt anger, hurt, and confusion. How could Ryan do this to me? I needed answers, and I needed them now.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
Ryan was in the living room playing video games. I could hear the sounds of explosions and his excited shouts as he played. I clutched the earring tightly in my hand and marched into the living room, my mind racing with questions and accusations. I walked up and stood in front of the TV, blocking his view.
“Kelly, sweetheart, you’re blocking my game. I can’t see anything,” Ryan said, his eyes still glued to the screen.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
I felt my anger rising. “Don’t you have something to tell me?” I asked, my voice shaking with frustration.
Ryan looked up at me, puzzled. “What do you mean? I’m afraid I need more specifics.”
“Alright,” I said, taking a deep breath. I held up the earring so he could see it clearly. “What is THIS doing in our bedroom?”
Ryan’s face went blank. He looked genuinely confused, as if he was searching for the right words. “I don’t know, I’ve never seen it before.”
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
“Really? Are you that inattentive to your lover? Or was your attention focused on something else?” I snapped, my anger boiling over.
“Lover? You think I’m cheating on you?” Ryan stood up from the couch, looking at me with wide eyes.
“What else am I supposed to think when I find an earring in our bed?” I demanded, my voice rising.
Ryan reached out and took my shoulders, looking me straight in the eyes. “Kelly, I love you, and I would never cheat on you.”
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
“You’re saying someone planted this earring?” I asked, still not convinced.
Ryan shook his head. “I don’t know where it came from. Maybe it’s your sister’s. She stayed at our place when we went on vacation, remember?”
I paused, thinking back to our trip. My younger sister, Jessica, had indeed stayed at our place to take care of the cat. “Pray it’s Jessica’s,” I muttered, heading back to the bedroom to get my phone.
I dialed Jessica’s number, and she answered almost immediately. “Hey, I was just about to call you,” she said.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
“Why? Did something happen?” I asked, my heart pounding in my chest.
“I’ve been missing an earring for days. Did you guys find it by any chance? I think I might have left it at your place,” Jessica said, sounding hopeful.
I let out a shaky breath. “Y-yes, that’s why I called you.”
“Great! I thought I’d never find it,” she said with a laugh.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
I forced a nervous laugh in return. “What?” Jessica asked, sensing something was off.
“Can you imagine, I almost thought Ryan was cheating on me,” I admitted, feeling a mix of relief and embarrassment.
“That’s awful! I can imagine how worried you were,” Jessica said sympathetically.
“Yeah, I’m really glad it turned out to be your earring,” I said, feeling a weight lift off my shoulders.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Pexels
“I’ll swing by in a few days to pick it up,” Jessica said.
“Sure, sure, of course,” I replied, ending the call.
I went back to the living room where Ryan was waiting. “You were right; the earring is Jessica’s,” I said, feeling a rush of relief.
“See, I told you,” Ryan replied with a small smile.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
I sat next to him on the couch and hugged him tightly. “I’m sorry for accusing you of cheating.”
“It’s okay, I understand how it looked,” Ryan said, holding me close.
“So, you’re not mad at me?” I asked, looking up at him.
“No, I would’ve thought the same if I were in your shoes,” Ryan said softly and kissed my forehead.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Pexels
We sat there for a while, holding each other, and I promised myself to trust Ryan more and communicate better. After the earring incident, something in me shifted. I couldn’t shake the feeling that Ryan was hiding something from me.
Although the earring turned out to be Jessica’s, certain things still didn’t sit right with me. Ryan started coming home late from work more often. He was frequently texting someone, and he had more “business meetings” than ever before.
Every time I questioned him, he had a perfectly reasonable explanation, but it never felt right.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
“Why don’t you trust me?” Ryan would ask, looking hurt.
“I don’t know,” I would reply, feeling torn. “It’s just a feeling.”
One day, my car broke down. I had to use Ryan’s car to run errands. On my way back home, my phone slipped under the seat when it rang. I parked at the nearest convenient spot to retrieve it, thinking it might be a work call.
As I reached under the seat, my fingers brushed against a small box. I pulled it out and found a pack of condoms. My heart sank. What a jerk! I thought. I knew they weren’t for us because I was on the pill. My intuition had been right all along; Ryan was indeed cheating on me.
Anger and betrayal surged through me. This time, I decided not to confront him directly. Instead, I wanted to make him face the consequences of his actions.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
I took a brooch from my jacket and punctured the pack of condoms. Let him learn his lesson, I thought grimly.
Instead of going home, I went straight to my lawyer’s office. I arranged for him to start preparing divorce papers. I felt a strange sense of calm as I explained everything to the lawyer. I knew this was the right thing to do.
When I returned home, I acted calmly and sweetly, which Ryan seemed to like. He didn’t suspect a thing. Inside, I was seething, but I knew I had to play my part perfectly.
I was determined to take everything he had. Three months passed while my lawyer and I prepared everything for the divorce, ensuring it would be in my favor. During those three months, I was the perfect wife.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
I cooked Ryan’s favorite meals, laughed at his jokes, and never questioned his late nights or secretive phone calls. Ryan seemed to enjoy my behavior, blissfully unaware of what was coming. He didn’t suspect a thing.
Finally, the day came for me to reveal Ryan’s infidelity in front of the entire family. It was my mother’s birthday, and both Ryan’s parents and my family were present. If only I had known what was coming.
Ryan and I arrived at my mother’s place and presented her with a gift. Jessica was there too, but I didn’t feel like talking to her. I still thought Ryan had cheated on me with her, and that the earring wasn’t just a coincidence.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
My mother had divorced our father when Jessica and I were still in school. She never had any serious relationships afterward. Therefore, Ryan and his father took charge of the barbecue dinner.
I noticed my mother lingering around them, and I started thinking she might be trying to seduce Ryan’s father. But the truth was far worse than I had imagined.
Just before we all sat down to eat, my mother, who had always drunk wine, raised a glass of orange juice to make a toast. I found it odd, but I didn’t say anything.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
“I’m so glad you’re all here because I have wonderful news!” my mother said, her eyes sparkling with excitement. “I’m pregnant!”
Everyone gasped and started congratulating her, except for Jessica and me, who remained seated with our mouths open. I glanced at Ryan standing off to the side, looking pale and nervous.
“But you’re 46!” Jessica exclaimed, her voice filled with shock.
“Love knows no age,” my mother replied with a smile.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
Doubts began to creep into my mind. Maybe my mother wasn’t trying to seduce Ryan’s father. “Who’s the father?” I asked, my voice trembling.
“That’s not important. I’m just happy to have this baby, and that’s all that matters,” my mother said, avoiding my gaze.
“It’s Ryan, isn’t it?” I asked, my heart pounding.
Jessica looked at me, bewildered. “You mean your husband, Ryan?”
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
“Yes,” I said, my voice shaking. “Three months ago, I found condoms in Ryan’s car and punctured them. I thought he was sleeping with you, but now I’m almost sure he was with our mother.”
“What are you talking about?!” my mother exclaimed, her face turning red.
“Please, let’s skip the drama. Just tell me yes or no,” I said, feeling tears welling up in my eyes.
“I would never do that to you!” my mother shouted, her voice breaking.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
I took a deep breath, trying to stay calm. “I have divorce papers in my bag that will transfer almost everything Ryan owns to me. But if you tell me the truth, I might reconsider.”
“I’m telling you the truth!” my mother yelled, her hands shaking.
Ryan stepped forward, his face pale. “Yes, I cheated on you with your mother,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.
“What are you doing?” my mother hissed at him, her eyes wide with fear.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
“I can’t let her take everything I have!” Ryan shouted, his voice cracking.
“Well, perfect,” I said, pulling the divorce papers out of my bag and placing them on the table. “Sign these and give them to my lawyer,” I told Ryan, my voice cold and steady.
“So you’re not taking everything?” Ryan asked hopefully, his eyes pleading.
“I said I MIGHT reconsider, but I decided not to. This is exactly what you both deserve,” I said, standing up from the table.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
I walked out of the house to the sound of Ryan and my mother yelling and cursing at me. I felt a mix of anger and relief as I stepped outside. Jessica chased after me, her face filled with concern.
“You really thought it was me?” she asked, her voice soft.
“If it weren’t for your earring, I wouldn’t have started suspecting him in the first place,” I replied, feeling a wave of sadness wash over me.
We both left the house, never to return. I felt a strange sense of closure as we walked away, leaving behind the betrayal and lies. It was time to start a new chapter, one where I could finally find peace.
For illustration purposes only. | Source: Midjourney
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If you enjoyed this story, read this one: As a psychologist, Kate often navigates the turbulent waters of troubled relationships. But when Colin’s case takes an unexpected twist, Kate finds herself breaking protocol and stepping into uncharted territory.
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