In August 2017, Tony Alarcon’s phone rang unexpectedly.
Like many parents, he thought it might be a telemarketer. But this time, he answered the call.
Hearing from the school can be nerve-wracking for any parent. Tony immediately started worrying—was his daughter, Demetra, okay? Had something happened?
What he found out left him surprised.
It was a hot summer day in Northern California, with temperatures reaching 90 degrees. Tony had dropped off his 13-year-old daughter, Demetra, at school that morning. She wore a blue romper to stay cool in the heat, and neither of them thought the outfit would cause any issues.
Demetra, a student at Raymond J. Fisher Middle School in Los Gatos, California, had simply dressed for the weather.
Not everyone agreed with Demetra’s outfit. A teacher at her school said her romper was “too distracting” for the boys.
When the teacher told Demetra that her outfit was too short, her dad, Tony, rushed back to the school with a change of clothes—jean shorts and a tank top. But the school said those clothes were also inappropriate.
Tony was shocked. He asked Demetra to bend over and touch her toes in front of the school administrator. “Nothing is hanging out. There’s nothing inappropriate. I don’t understand this dress code rule,” he told TODAY.
Still, the school said her clothes were “distracting.” Since it was 90 degrees outside, Tony had no choice but to go to his car and grab a pair of leggings for Demetra to wear.
Demetra felt embarrassed.
Tony expressed his frustration, saying, “She’s just a kid. She’s only 13. She’s not trying to be a sex symbol. She just wants to be comfortable and attend class, but we’re not giving her that chance.”
This wasn’t the first time Demetra had been in trouble for her clothes. Just a week before, she was called out for a visible bra strap. “When I got dress coded last week, they said my bra strap was showing,” Demetra told the *San Jose Mercury News*. “Like, I’m wearing a bra—what’s the big deal?”
Tony, a successful investment advisor and father of two, didn’t let it go. Angry at what he saw as an unfair rule that mostly targeted girls, he took his complaint to social media. Parents from all over the country showed their support, agreeing that the school’s dress code was outdated and unfair to girls.
“Demetra’s not the only one. If you sit in the school parking lot, you’ll see that,” Tony said. “Lots of girls just want to be comfortable, but they feel forced to wear leggings even when it’s 100 degrees outside.”
Tony believed that parents, not schools, should decide if their children’s clothes are appropriate. He was also worried about how being told their clothing is a “distraction” to boys could affect young girls emotionally in the long run.
The story quickly got attention from the media, with major news outlets reporting on Tony’s efforts to change the dress code. While the school didn’t speak on camera, they did release a statement:
“The Los Gatos Union School District believes that appropriate dress and grooming contribute to a productive learning environment,” the district said. “Students are expected to wear clothes that reflect the core values of our learning community.”
Tony’s efforts made an impact. His push for change led the Los Gatos Union School District to reevaluate its dress code to make it fairer and less strict for all students.
Lisa Fraser, the school’s principal, explained that the dress code rules, called “Fashion Faux Pas,” apply to both girls and boys. Some of the rules include no hats or hoods indoors, no visible underwear, no inappropriate logos or words, and shorts must have at least 4-inch inseams.
“There has always been a dress code,” Fraser told a newspaper. “These are basic rules for appropriate behavior. I can set guidelines for the school, but I want them to reflect the community’s values.”
In the end, Tony Alarcon’s persistence started an important discussion about how school dress codes affect young girls — showing that one parent’s voice can truly make a difference.
What do you think about the school’s dress code? Have you or your children faced a similar situation? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments!
Parents Took 5 Kids To Dinner, Handed Note About Their Children
Getting many younger youngsters out to try to eat is no straightforward endeavor. Normally, it feels like herding cats and leaves mothers and fathers with huge anxiousness over how their small children may behave. 1 couple knew this but chose to consider their 5 young ones out to consume anyway. Substantially to their shock, a stranger was viewing their household of 7 and felt the have to have to create them a be aware about their children’s habits in the restaurant.
Ryan and Maggie Bokrost know all too effectively how tricky it can be to just take a number of children out to meal. Staying a substantial loved ones, they know that some foods are calmer than some others due to the fact even 1 youngster can be a handful. When you have five, meal out is constantly a gamble, not recognizing if it will be eaten in peace or chaos. But, that’s a danger the Bokrosts had been eager to just take when they headed out for a family members dinner at Rico’s Hacienda in Woodlands, Texas.
Considering that Rico’s marketed a family-pleasant location, it seemed like the great area to go for a loved ones with five kids, the place they would not have to get worried about strangers throwing daggers with their eyes if their youngsters had been a minor rowdy. So, Ryan and Maggie Bokrost took their huge spouse and children out for meal at Rico’s on a Wednesday evening, and a great deal to their delight, they thought almost everything experienced long gone very well. Then, they questioned for the invoice, only to understand their children’s behavior experienced caught the attention of a stranger.
Just after inquiring for the check, a stunned Ryan and Maggie Bokrost ended up advised it had by now been paid. Not only that, the generous stranger had remaining them a personalized notice, which talked about the way their youngsters acted that evening in the restaurant. “I requested for the monthly bill and the waiter brought me the little booklet with the take note in it. I was speechless and not fairly confident what was likely on,” Ryan recalled.
“Sir I was so amazed with your loved ones tonight. Your children had been well-mannered and courteous. You two must be very pleased as dad and mom. You each have performed properly,” the be aware read, in accordance to Click2Houston. “It was my enjoyment to spend your bill tonight. Your household is truly a breath of refreshing air in the days of young children screaming and managing close to. Have a blessed day and 7 days.”
The household of seven said they felt blessed just after their expertise at Rico’s and explained that they have place in the work to teach their kids to behave. “We just check out to make sure to permit them know that when they are out in public, exclusively, that they are nicely-behaved,” Ryan claimed, outlining what he and Maggie had taught their 5 youngsters, who variety in age from 4 to 14.
“It’s about being a blessing to anyone all-around you,” Maggie included. Thanks to the letter, the Bokrosts realized that the essential lessons they experienced taught their children hadn’t long gone unnoticed. While the loved ones had hoped to thank the kind stranger for their heartfelt terms and generous gesture, the person who wrote the take note and compensated their bill was now long gone and the observe hadn’t been signed.
The stranger’s act of kindness won’t be forgotten by the Bokrost relatives. “This individual stepping out and bringing the very good rather of the lousy was extremely wonderful,” Ryan reported. He and Maggie additional that they utilized the opportunity to teach their young children that no make a difference how youthful they are, they can still impact the entire world.
In fact, whilst it’s usually a child’s nature to be curious, playful, and even social with strangers, these kinds of habits in a community area meant for dining can be not only distracting but unsafe. Fortunately, the Bokrost spouse and children proved that with a very little conversation, education and learning, and self-control, even a relatives with five youngsters can take care of to have evening meal with no interrupting some others. In addition, their tale reminds all of us that sometimes a simple compliment can go a lengthy way — and acquiring your parenting praised for your children’s fantastic manners and carry out has to be just one of the most flattering compliments a mom and dad can get.
Leave a Reply