Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you in our 7 years of marriage & I have nothing to show for it.
These last 2 weeks have been tough for me. Your boss notified me that you quit your job today & that was just too much to bear any longer.
Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.
You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife.
Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, It’s over and I am leaving.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Dear Ex-Husband,
Believe me, nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s definitely true that you & I have been married for the past 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been.
I watch my TV shows so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping, although that doesn’t seem to work.
I definitely noticed your haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ And since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I decided not to comment.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 long years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could make this work. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone.
Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem!
Please share this story with your friends and family if you think it was funny.
Mix Parsley with Apple! A Secret No One Will Tell You – 100% Effective! !
Some of the best natural remedies are simple yet powerful!
Parsley and apple might not seem like an obvious combination, but together, they create a health-boosting drink packed with vitamins, antioxidants, and detoxifying properties. This 100% effective mixture can help cleanse the body, boost energy, and support overall well-being!
Why Mix Parsley and Apple?
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Apple – Rich in fiber and antioxidants, apples help cleanse the digestive system, regulate blood sugar, and boost heart health.
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Parsley – Known for its powerful detoxifying effects, parsley supports kidney health, reduces bloating, and provides essential vitamins like C, K, and iron.
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The Perfect Combo! – Together, they create a nutrient-dense, refreshing drink that detoxifies the body, improves digestion, and supports weight management.
How to Prepare This Secret Detox Drink
Ingredients:
- 1 fresh apple (green or red)
- 1 handful of fresh parsley
- 1 cup of water
- Juice of half a lemon (optional)
Instructions:
1️⃣ Chop the apple into small pieces (keep the skin for extra fiber).
2️⃣ Add the apple, parsley, and water to a blender.
3️⃣ Blend until smooth.
4️⃣ Strain if desired, or drink as is for extra fiber.
5️⃣ Add lemon juice for a refreshing twist!
Best Time to Drink It?
For maximum benefits, drink it first thing in the morning on an empty stomach or as an afternoon energy booster.
What Happens When You Drink This?
- Flushes out toxins and supports kidney function
- Boosts metabolism and aids digestion
- Strengthens immunity with vitamins and antioxidants
- Reduces bloating and supports weight balance
A Secret Worth Sharing!
Now you know the power of parsley and apple! Give this easy, natural drink a try, and enjoy the incredible health benefits that come with it.
Nature’s best-kept secret is now yours! 🍏🌿🔥✨
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